Oil Pulling = Disgusting

I don’t know if you’ve heard about this but it’s the latest craze. You put a tablespoon of coconut oil in your mouth and swirl it around for 20 min (you read that right) and this is supposed to fight against plaque and gingivitis. Well, one of the most common side-effects of my depression is not taking care of myself. Like, not showering, not brushing my teeth, not eating properly, etc. It’s the one I struggle with the most because, of course, it’s every day.

I lost my dental insurance when I lost my job and cancelled my 6 month checkup. Now I’m pretty certain I have a cavity. Probably two. Ok, maybe more- my teeth have always been horrible. I checked out this dentistry college to see if I could get checked out there but they’ve taken down the appointment request form because they’re so swamped.

I bought a jar of “cold-pressed, extra virgin coconut oil” yesterday for my hands since winter is starting. I’d seen and read enough articles that I finally decided to try it out. Well, it definitely worked. I used it like Vaseline petroleum jelly: only taking a little,then I rubbing it all over my hands and I was fine for the next 24 hours. Sure, I could have put on more earlier and maybe they would have felt even better but it was definitely better than the Vaseline lotion we have in the kitchen.

So I’m desperate, my teeth are starting to protest, and I just experienced coconut oil working very well for my skin. Why not try “oil pulling” with it? I checked WedMD as, like, a last minute thing to make sure nothing said it would hurt me and it supported it. Apparently, its an ancient form of dental care and coconut oil shows in research to work against plaque and the bad bacteria. I decided I’d just swirl the stuff the entire time I was in the shower. So I scooped out a tablespoon, threw it in my mouth, and promptly regretted my decision.

First, I wasn’t even in love with the smell of coconut in the first place. Now I’m tasting it and can’t get rid of it. Second, this is not like swirling Listerine. This is oil and the texture is like… having your mouth full of something you can’t even completely taste or feel but it’s definitely a lot. My boyfriend said he used take some of this and keep it on his tongue until it melted completely and then swallow it. He’s an alien because there’s no way in hell any adult could have gotten me to do this. I lasted a minute, maybe, before spitting it in the sink. Oh, by the way, don’t do that. The oil can clog up your sink and it certainly leaves a nasty residue. I think I may have swallowed some too, which is also not something you’re supposed to do because then the bad stuff doesn’t get out of your system. Then entire time I was in the shower I was trying to cough up this, probably imaginary, bit of oil at the back of my throat.

I’m desperate. I’ve gone to the dentist and had 5 cavities and needed a crown. The most cavities I’ve had at once is 7.

So now that I have some idea of what I’m getting myself into I get out the paper towels to spit in, set the stop-watch on my phone, and only do a teaspoon.

The shock was gone.. so I made it 3 minutes. I will never do it again (unless I feel super desperate again). I’m just going to use it for my hands and maybe hair.

Oh Depression, the adventures you give me.

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